why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
