I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
