I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
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