We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
