Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
