my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize