I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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