Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
