But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize
