he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
