Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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