I wannas sexs uuuuu
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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