Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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