K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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