when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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