The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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