SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
