apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
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