so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
