how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize