What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
