called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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