Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
