It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
And then my night got REAL pukey
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
