It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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