having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize