he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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