i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
