so that wasnt chicken after all
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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