he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
