So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
