his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
