The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
