Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
