i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Never underestimate the power of titties
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
