I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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