I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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