NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
