after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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