oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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