Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
