Got a toothbrush?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I don't deserve a penis
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
