1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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