I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
