Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
