If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Randomize
