something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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