Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
