More tranny stories later!
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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