We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Randomize
